Verbivorehere's Weblog

Reflections on Reality!

Warring with White Lies

If  someone starts talking about my follies they just have a blast there! And half of my going into hide outs when i meet people is coz of this ‘confidence’ of them finding out my ‘true self’. Eby’s friends welcomed me to Mumbai with ‘great respect’, and hey I’m not exaggerating here. They would clean up the house if they knew I was to go there, they’d attach ‘silencers’ to their otherwise ‘beautiful’ vocabulary, they used to hide when any one revealed the others tryst with the neighborhood girl, and they even used to leave one entire sofa (plss not coz of my width! I promise) for me to sit while they flock together n the floor. Me? yeah i did enjoy playing the great ‘Big Sister’ game. I would smile at their genaral talks which they never actually addressed to me (out of respect ;P), I would laugh at their taunting each other infront of me..but I never ..ever used to open my mouth except for the one word answers.  Alas! Good times never last they say.

stpuid

Unfortunately husbands are this complexly programmed robots sent to earth who have ears only for cricket commentary, national geographic channel and all the news channel when you are talking about the color of the dress you’d like to buy, the Bag which is now Hype and the places on earth that ought to be seen. I often wonder about his hearing capacity and have screamed my ruminations of having a two-wheeler! But I was awed at his capacity of hearing the slightest and softest of my stupid statements, his commitment in recording them for days after and dedication in playing it back to his friends exactly when im around!! And i tell you my husband is extremely talented in this! As a result the above mentioned guys now dont talk when they see me coz they’ll be busy laughing their hearts out.

Eby was kind of enjoying the game till he realized that everything has 2 sides. If I was dumb enough to make him laugh so was I dumb enough to make him cringe ;P. As Ive already said they are complexly programmed there seems to be ‘different tactics’ to deal with different people which goes completely beyond my comprehension. He would teach me that I need to tell someone that we got late coz our bike broke down which I’d parrot perfectly, but when a second question comes as to do we have a bike.. Id stare blank. When the third question as to ‘was it a puncture’? I would vividly search for him rather than answer.  He’d deny to the best of his buddies having certain stuffs after a complex logical thought (which ofcourse is not worth discussing with me) when i’d jump in and ‘remind’ him with the best of my voice that the thing asked for is in the topmost shelf!

I guess the last straw atleast till now was yesterday night. We were completely unwell and bedridden n xmas when there was an invite from his cousin’s place for dinner.  We just couldnt say no..for (dont ask me the reason!!only he knows! ) Knowing me well enough by now he cautioned to me that I was not to interfere till he told me to. He handled it smooth enough i guess as we were suppose to go there just for a ‘hi’ with the pretension that we had dinner under unavoidable circumstances elsewhere. He took me for dinner at a chinese restaurant and taught me the place name which i should say, the time we went, the reason why we got late and many other. ((Now i guess my hearing capacity was limited to the beauty of switzerland the guys n the next table were talking about)

So we landed up there and all were full of smiles until ofcourse when asked what we had for dinner i told – chinese chop suey and veg manchurian and as to the question whether the friends we met were a couple I said “yes a sweet couple”!! Apparently the ‘unavoidable’ circumstance that Eby had infact told them was that his ‘bachelor’ friend’s parents had come down for xmas and wanted to treat his ‘city’ friends with proper ‘traditional’ kerala food ;P.

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December 26, 2008 - Posted by | Uncategorized

30 Comments »

  1. LOL…you are bad at lying!! thats soo sad chechi. Am planning to have a crash course on how to bluff plz join in it :P.

    Can imagine ur hubby’s state when caught in the middle. Reminds an incident from childhood. I had hid my cricket bat behind the doors of our bedroom so that the neighbour’s kid does not take it,gave him some lame reasons for the bat going missing. Yet he came in and was searching all around…out of the blue my sis shouted “hey don’t search behind the bedroom doors”.

    Comment by nautankey | December 26, 2008 | Reply

  2. LOL…this was too much 😀
    BTW your description of character husband is toooo good :-)…I loved the opening sentence of your second para!

    Comment by Kanupriya | December 26, 2008 | Reply

  3. lol…

    I can be a very good liar in such cases…have plenty of excuses as well 😉

    Comment by Smita | December 26, 2008 | Reply

  4. LOL. Next time you go for such get togethers, please SHUT your mouth. 🙂 Tell them you are in some kind of mouna vrutham. aa paavam manushyanu maanekedaayi kaanum !!!

    and I thought women were those complexly programmed robots. Its hard to understand a woman and I am sure every woman out there would agree with me 😉

    Comment by vimal | December 26, 2008 | Reply

  5. @Nautankey – now u understand my admiration for u ;P only things which are beyond ur reach u admnire i guess.:))

    @kanupriya – yeah when it comes to describing him the worst possile method i guess i go study a thesis on it ;P hes no worse ;P

    @Smita – well the initial one liner is not a problem with me..but the questions thereaftr with the “logical” replies to a hypothetical situation..geees! im out of it!!

    @Vimal – mone dinesha – i pose a serious threat to u ;P u dnt realize it?? well all your comments would be carved and framed and kept for future reference. Dont ye worry.

    Comment by verbivorehere | December 27, 2008 | Reply

  6. I loved that story verbivore, you’re a born comedienne, I’m still laughing. However I’m not on of those complexly programmed robots, my interests are far and wide and include the opposite sex.

    Comment by Beagle | December 27, 2008 | Reply

  7. 😀 Wow… That’s some revelation! 😉

    Season’s greetings!

    Peace.

    Comment by Kartz | December 27, 2008 | Reply

  8. I have something interesting for you here :

    http://vimalsparadise.blogspot.com/2008/12/best-mallu-wins.html

    Comment by vimmuuu | December 27, 2008 | Reply

  9. Unfortunately husbands are this complexly programmed robots sent to earth…………..huaaauaahuaahuaahuaaaahh.
    This is too much, btw who is sending them to earth??? 😛

    Comment by tarun goel | December 29, 2008 | Reply

  10. @BEAgle – hey there beagle you seem to creep in consistently here! Great to have a KOAla in my small land 🙂

    @Kartz – Long time since youve updated your post i guess.Season’s greetings to you too.

    @Tarun -Brahma, The Lord, or Supremacy – when they/him created husbands they just messed too much with the programming i guess ;P

    Comment by verbivorehere | December 29, 2008 | Reply

  11. Good humor! Liked the post very much!

    Comment by Gopinath Mavinkurve | December 29, 2008 | Reply

  12. LOL 😀
    Very nice post.. laughing all the way..
    And by the way I have done your tag:

    http://kanaguonline.wordpress.com/2008/12/16/the-movie-quirk-and-delhi-daredevil/

    Comment by kanagu | December 29, 2008 | Reply

  13. ROFL!!! and this is y i dont wanna get married at all. n if at all i ever do get married, i pray to God to get me a husband who 1. listens to me patiently, doesnt talk when i m irritated, doesnt lie, n DOESNT MAKE ME LIE!! 😀 but then.. i guess God’ll have to manufacture a whole new person if he has to fit in all the qualities i want!! 😛

    Comment by AV | December 29, 2008 | Reply

  14. So you mean to say that these complex creatures are unwanted in the heavens as well 😦
    Poor husbands!!

    Comment by tarun goel | December 30, 2008 | Reply

  15. @ Gopinath – thnx 🙂

    @Kanagu – hey thnx for doing the tag..ive dropped in the comments

    @AV – hope i dnt misguide you. they are soo niice u knw ;P u just take care tht u dnt talk of the topics i mentioned ;P

    @Tarun – Ahem!! I better reserve my comments now just in case my hubby visits here ;P

    Comment by verbivorehere | December 30, 2008 | Reply

  16. Is this my first time here? I think it’s my first time here? Can you confirm if this is my first comment on your blog? Because I distinctly remember commenting some time back and was quite surprised not to find you on my blogroll, and vice versa! 😀

    Comment by Nikhil | December 30, 2008 | Reply

  17. @Nikhil – LOL..this is your first time here..and probably tht xplains th rest ;P thnx for dropping by..im adding u now ;P

    Comment by verbivorehere | December 31, 2008 | Reply

  18. he he he..i am totally with u on how hubbies have eyes and ears only for news channel ( i am ok with nat geo , thou).. god knows what kick they get out of listening to the same news item for more than once .. and i am bad at lying too ..:-)

    Comment by bhargavi | December 31, 2008 | Reply

    • 🙂 i know..lol…hope he doesnt see too much of my ‘opposed’ comments..time to ask for shopping allowance u knw 😉

      Comment by verbivorehere | December 31, 2008 | Reply

  19. Happy New Year Verbi!May all ur wishes and dreams come true ! 🙂
    dint read this post yet wud b back soon with a more relavant comment 😉

    Comment by Sahaja | January 1, 2009 | Reply

  20. hey this one was too good..could relate myself to it…reading through i was actually recollecting some instances of myself and my twin brother..werein he trains me with some of the white lies..and mostly i goof them up:)

    Comment by sangeeta | January 1, 2009 | Reply

  21. Happy new year Verbi 🙂 Wishing you to have a lot of fun this year 🙂

    Comment by kanagu | January 1, 2009 | Reply

  22. Beagle sends you best wishes for a Happy and Healthy New Year.

    Comment by Beagle | January 1, 2009 | Reply

  23. @ Sahaja – ;P il wait for tht comeback lol

    @Sangeeta – I know i still remember the comment ma friend told when u turned left as i told we r sitting n the right corner ;P

    @Kanagu – thnx ya and wish you the same.

    @Beagle – thnx ..and wish u the same to u too..have posted n yabberline..

    Comment by verbivorehere | January 2, 2009 | Reply

  24. Chechi,
    You have been awarded.. http://nautankey.blogspot.com/2009/01/randomnophobia.html
    Cheers 🙂

    Comment by nautankey | January 2, 2009 | Reply

  25. Hilarious. Great post. Finding oneself. LOL. BTW thanx for voting for my poem. I never got the opportunity to thank you because I saw the comments now only!!! And my poem won too. So thanx^2 to you. Cheers
    And Happy New Year by the way!!!

    Comment by Puneet | January 8, 2009 | Reply

  26. i njyd ur blog. Can u add me to your blogroll? Will add you to mine as well…just let me know wen u do it!IGNORE this if u rnt intrstd…Happy new year!!!

    Comment by vivek | January 8, 2009 | Reply

  27. are u mallu btw?

    Comment by vivek | January 8, 2009 | Reply

  28. hi, just wantd to thank u. Thnx for the blogroll. Btw…u shud update more often to get more readers…tc

    Comment by vivek | January 9, 2009 | Reply

  29. lol you have learnt about the species called husbands pretty fast i must say! What a description! Pretty apt.
    BTW I am sure happy to find another foot-in-mouth case haha I thought i was the only one who goofed up at the drop of the hat

    Comment by whatsinaname | February 25, 2009 | Reply


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